this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
I fucking hate you. Some slutty looking drunk chick backed her ass up across the bar and started grinding on you. You ignored her because you didn't want to share you drink
I care about my drink far more than her feelings
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
I don't really want to talk about it, but if anyone finds my unicorn mask with my bra in it, I would really like that back.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
You can come over but I have to warn you that it is naked Sunday.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
Randomize
