Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
All I know is she walked in crying with a bag of limes and a bottle of tequila and has been locked in her room blasting lil wayne ever since.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
Once again, marijuana saves me from going to jail
Do you want to get naked and order pizza with me
I wish I could send you one of those donuts I had. Like teleport it to you. Because it would change your life
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