im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Vodka?
Forever.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
He said I have a comfortable vagina. What does that even mean?
I didn't want to shower, so I shaved my legs in the pool . That drunk .
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Randomize