I told him I would sleep with him if he could name all the colors of the wind.
It's not just about fucking anymore... We decided we're actually in like now..
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
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