U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
He keeps trying to sell me the forks from his kitchen drawer
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I now have a GPA requirement for guys I hookup with more than once.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
Sorry about my life...
On a scale of 1-10, how inappropriate is it to sneak into someone's box of sex toys and put googly eyes on their vibrator?
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
Randomize
