I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
I'm trying to think of how to explain to the dentist tomorrow that I think I pulled my jaw muscle eating pizza while drunk.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
Having the sex-a-thon in the back yard led to some really odd tan lines.
Like handprints on my lower back...
No. No. No. No one's allowed to fuck in the yurt.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
So there is a 50% chance that he just left my house and a 100% chance that I have to be up for work in 2 hours...
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
Randomize