so how much must it suck for him to know that the penis of his best man has been in his wife's mouth before?
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
PS, you're not being slutty, you're "making dreams true."
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
she's not going to take you seriously with an empty 40 and a sombrero on your head.
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
I don't go out. I live in my room watching Bridget Jones and thanking my vibrator for existing.
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
