I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Really? How much of his life do you think he remembers? I'm pretty sure 75% of it qualifies as "kind of a blur".
She's just so happy...and so naked.
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
Randomize
