have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
Woke up to sesame street reruns and a $62 pizza bill. Never again. I mean it this time.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Bitch got stabbed in the eye. With a fork. Wait for it... At church. I was the only one at a party interested in her story. Only in the south
Randomize
