STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
Just saw truck nuts on a handicap conversion van
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
These guys are walking up and down the hallway yelling, "Yo, is this the floor with the unisex bathroom?"
i'm on the subway and being revisted by the ghosts of tequilas past.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Sometimes I look at the people in school that are obviously very diligent and on top of their studies, and then I wonder why they don't smoke weed.
I'm just going to text him the word sex repeatedly until he comes over.
Did it work?
Duh, it only took 27 texts and 15 minutes and he was at my front door.
We have so much sex to catch up on
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
Saw a dude last night at a strip club's bar eating canned pineapple and giving tootsie pops to the girls...
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
We’re leaving where are you
Hold on Toxic just started playing
Randomize