four loko is apparently banned in the us. so i think its time for us to stock up. i already emailed them about buying them in bulk
he stopped making out with me and said "can I make you grilled cheese? I feel like I owe YOU something"
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Let me begin my 3 part apology by saying that you are a wonderful human being...
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
I'm trying to be celibate. I'm having me time. I'm eating cake.
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
Dude, my vagina feels like new again! I love antibiotics. How's your day?
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
A bitchslap is in order.
i got my period today. mid walk of shame and im wearing a shirt that says stay classy. my life is a joke.
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
Randomize