Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
I have two stamps on my hand....ones from the bar and one is from an aquarium...care to explain?
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
I drunkenly said, "That's my future father-in-law!" And everyone made an uncomfortable / disgusted face... including the aforementioined future father-in-law. Maybe I should start dating other people.
Randomize
