I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
OHMYGOD did I try to use pinesol as a mixer?
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
So we reenacted men's olympic skeet shooting using roman candles and flattened beer cans. That's all
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
He called me skinny, I broke his garbage disposal, then denied him sex. Normal second date etiquette.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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