And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
i failed horribly. studying for that final was as pointless as Vinnie is to Jersey Shore
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
He said he'd prefer a photo rather than discuss politics, I sent him a snapchat "conservative shorts 4 conservative man". He said "be liberal"
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
