may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
at roughly 3:30am you called me saying you were gonna start a big game of strip twister in politics class and i was your partner.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
He wants to take me instead of his girlfriend to the happiest place on earth... By that He meant Vegas. My morals are just loose enough to think this is a good idea
I watch one musical on Netflix, and the "Suggested for you" section is literally almost the entire gay movie category. I feel profiled, and netflixs' accuracy about my sexuality is both impressive and offensive.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
