ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Holy jesus god. My teeth taste like street.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Randomize
