Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
i upgraded from drunk texts to drunk e-mails...real world here i come
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
You sucked the drug dealers dick for a 20 of coke...?
Nooo, I payed for that. I sucked his dick because I had an urge.
He grabbed every salt shaker in the apartment and we haven't seen him since. He really really doesn't want to shovel snow anymore.
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
I've only been home four days and my parents' cleaning lady already wrote down the number to AA and told me she's praying for me.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
Nothing makes the walk of shame as great as disapproval from a mom getting ready for work
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
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