super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
so i was eating a special k bar this morning for breakfast and started choking on it so i reached into my bag for water turns out it was liquor.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Had an orgasm and got a charley horse at the same time. It was a multi-purpose scream.
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