It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I was so drunk last night i ate cereal with a fork.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
you kept lifting my skirt up, yelling "PANTY PARTY". needless to say, you're at the top of my father's shit list right now.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
Passing out is just my bodies way of protecting my liver.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
I am way to hungover for it to be Thursday.
Randomize