I tried to give up sex for lent. It feels weird that on easter I'm this excited to be a whore again
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
And some old guy told me Jesus loves me and I laughed super hard and told him sinning is fun. Hahaha
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
It's 10:15 on a Wednesday night and my dick is covered in pop rocks. How's your Wednesday going?
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Made it to my hair appointment on time, and got some dick. Today is already a great day
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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