Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
There was jim beam in your oven. I just preheated it.
I puked in the AC vent. thing are gonna get ugly come summertime.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Hi. I probably already told you this mid puke, but thanks again for babysitting me last night. How did I get in the car?
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
apparently when a guy says "if there's anything missing in your life, I will provide" he's not expecting attractive lesbians to be the answer.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
Well. We had sex and then watched 6 episodes of Dateline NBC together; only breaking the silence to make disapproving noises at shotty police work. So basically yea I'm gonna marry him.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Randomize
