You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
You have the perkiest tits in all of North America. You're fine.
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
we live vicariously through your huge boobs
Bruh. You offered the cashier tater tots that you had stuffed in your pocket.
Yeah, and? She might've been hungry.
Randomize
