I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
then she came back into the room with a neckbrace on. i thought she was getting ready for the pounding of a lifetime.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
We can grow old together and our livers can fail together
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Don't lose. A little bit of my soul dies every time a beer pong game is lost.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
He said he would pay my bar tab if he couldn't answer my question. He lost to the age old question of our youth. Why did pogs go out of style.
Just made a beer run. At 9am. In my pjs. I should not be graduating today
the dj asked me quote "are you sure you're sober enough to do this?" And I grabbed the mic from him and said "ill fucking show you sober- HIT IT". I also dropped the mic at the end so he had to come around and pick it up
Shania Twain would have been proud
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
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