Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
his penis was like watching paranormal activity your very hyped up to see it but you think it might be very scary and in the end you didnt really see anything at all
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Wake up we need to beat the walk of shame rush hour
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
I shit myself and fell down the stairs and I’m still finding shit In those pants.
Randomize
