I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
I thought you were single?
I am. But thats cuz no one wants to marry shame and regret doused in tequila. But thanks for reminding me ya dick.
Either your boy toy or the kid who pulled a knife on me in high school is here
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
You pole danced in your parka.
I better not get a vid of you penile helicoptering
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
We duck taped Dave to a rolling chair and shoved him in the bed of the truck then took off for a bit.. We didn't explain it that way when the nurse asked what happened though.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
Randomize