and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
You were sitting in the middle of the floor spewing vodka at people proclaiming "I a whale". That drunk.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
I found pix on her phone of me passed out and her sticking things up my ass. Its over.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I have no idea what happened last night but I sobered up whilst showering with a mop.
Randomize
