with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
it's too soon in the relationship to think about him when i masturbate. so i think about his dad instead.
I've ID'd the nipple biter.
You didn't know it was a gay bar until the 7th guy rejected you. You were crying because you thought it was just a bad night. No more for you.
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
Can we start referring to attractive men as "A fine piece of dick?"
Even if they did assume we were doing kinky shit, it's not like they're gonna be like, "HALT SATAN! INTAKE SOME JESUS AND VOMIT YOUR SINS!"
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
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