i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
I was thinking of baby names while I was giving him a blow job
She started to rub her ass on my shoulder and i instantly thought "i am going to get E. Coli"
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize