i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
now I regret adding my aunt on facebook. she remnded me today on my wall about the importance of checking my stools for blood since I have diaherria.
Even water is tasting like jack daniels
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
do you realize that she was the awkward lesbian in high school and now bangs more girls than probably both of us combined?!
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize