I used a bag of wine as a pillow last night.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
I know. You don't know poor life choice until your sitting on the floor of a community bathroom waiting to vomit at 4 am
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I cannot believe I am seriously having a conversation about my best friend's sexual prowess as a dream lesbian.
Randomize
