So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
I wore his All-American medal during sex. I came in first that night.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
Randomize
