We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
We forgot to go back and get the brick YOU WANTED TO BRING INTO THE BAR?
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
The fire department told the police that I was inside the burning building trying to pee in the rest of the electrical Outlets. Booyaka.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
Please don't buy a buttplug. It won't fill the empty space in your heart.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
He slept outside in his hammock, and then took a lawn chair with him in the shower because he was too drunk to stand up.
Idk... I'm not sure why anyone would use a flesh light in general. Let alone hook it up to a wifi device.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
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