Amandyke just told me shes gonna make my tongue her cum rag. i'm borderline terrified
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
The woman at the bus stop told me i smell delicious and asked if i wear cotton then proceeded to tell me about her shellfish allergy
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
Damn why is there no horse blowjob emoji?
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
she fell asleep in a torn bush after playing cards at a nursing home.
I never thought I'd say this but there's too many dicks around here.
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
