Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
just stole 2 cases of forties from some freshman in the woods by pretending to be a cop. that ten dollar spotlight is really turning a profit
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
He sent me a 2am email the just said "Ping". Nerdiest booty call ever.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
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