matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
Midget sex pt 2 tonight
i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
is it sad that whenever i need to spell "independent" i still sing that one rap song?
i just saw a girl w/ a shirt that said "im the single friend." yeah i bet u r. stop wearing shirts like that and that could change.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
The only comparison I have for the iPhone is that it's like youre constantly getting a blow job
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Sorry I told all the other bridesmaids you were an asshole. I had had a few drinks and it's how I felt at the time.
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
Randomize
