She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
My mom asked me to donate my child hood stuffed animals to the poor then I realized I was hiding liquor behind them. I told her I was too attached to them. She understood. Wrong in so many ways.
I'd suck anything for a pizza right now
The leasing office is hiring, so I gave them my resume and class schedule. I doubt they'll call me considering last summer at their "exotic animal" pool party I marched in with a funnel and demanded the employees chug. I doubt they've forgotten.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Jesus christos I come home and am treated like my vagina is made of gold
Either that or it dispenses candy
He was so drunk last night. He woke up out of a dead sleep at 330am, walked over to the dresser, opened his middle drawer and proceeded to pee. When I woke up and asked him Wtf he was doing, he told me it was fake pee and blamed it on the cat...we don't have a cat
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