check it out our google latitudes are spooning
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
he puts the penis in happiness.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
you regret 100% of the tequila shots you do take. thats what gretzky meant to say
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
If muffins & morning blowjobs don't make him happy, frankly, I don't think anything will.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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