it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
I just realized that I've become that person they make the alcohol warnings on medicine for.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
and you fell through a lawn chair
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
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