Then he told me I had the most beautiful looking vulva
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Hold on I'm doing something revolutionary that blossomed from a high idea
I was just laying in bed wondering if there's more important things in life than cheese stuffed pretzels.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
Because I'm a hot mess throwing up in the litter box
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
She wanted me to stick my dick in the birthday cake she got me
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Randomize
