awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
of course. lets lasso hookers.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
Just passed a Taco Bell Taco Supreme, still in its wrapper, laying in the grass. I'd like a moment of silence.
May it rest in peace.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
You were making dinosaur noises while jerking me off..
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
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