Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
Dude how the fuck are we gonna get the lawnmower outta the pool?
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
I wasn't that gone.
Dude, you cried and said how sorry you were when we asked why you had the dip.
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
