Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I thought she was mad at me, but then we did a pose off and I realized we're friends for life
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
In the middle of fucking me, she said "Hold on, I need my Hulk hands."
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
i'm drinking whiskey out of a ziplock bag in a movie theater. i'm THAT girl.
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
he said he's going to burn things and pack his stuff. he may leave tomorrow supposedly but i doubt it
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize