pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
I'm so fucking pissed that I wasted my shooting star wish on him and his little penis.
Either these are mashed potatoes in my pants, or I was drunker than I thought.
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
There was an awkward moment where I was going for his cock and he reach out and held my hand, thinking that what I was doing
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
My usual answer of have sex with it doesn't work in this situation
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
Aaand now my client contact has seen your boobs.
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Randomize
