WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
watching elf naked is so much better than watching it with clothes on .
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
You can't call dibs 8 years later.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
Randomize
