Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Just took a closer look at the paper that kid wrote me his number on. It was an ATM receipt. His balance is $17.89. i made the right choice.
i got so high last night i cried hysterically for like 5 minutes because i dont have any superpowers
Xanax and allergy medicine look a lot alike when you spill them on the floor. Just saying that I still have allergies but I'm unsure if I still have legs
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
There's a guy masturbating in front of Sephora right now
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
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