yeah i was sneaking up to her room and on the way i saw a picture of her and left
So what does a sober person do in Vegas on a Friday night?
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
Too drunk to talk to museum staff. So much for proper wednesdays
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
Randomize
