He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
You tried to wear your Jesus costume into Family Christian stores and say it was a book signing.
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
pretty sure if my vagina had a mouth, it would have been smiling afterwards.
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I seriously just drove by a man walking down the street wearing hospital scrubs, an 80s track jacket, gold necklace and carrying a flute.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
How does one un superglue their foot to the floor
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
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