belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
Thats about the time I should have known you would run around naked and try to make out with my sleeping mother
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
Last night I actually told him I came with a washer and dryer
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