So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Sorry we couldn't "turn off the mirrors." How're you feeling today?
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Randomize
