The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
Where the fuck do you get consience sedatives from?
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
AND HOLY SHIT FLUBBER IS ON NETFLIX
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
Randomize
