i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
Oh my god and he smells like heaven wrapped in a beard of knowledge
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Don't care if they even pay me; I lifeguard for the fringe benefits -- free tourist vagina in the Hilton jacuzzi every single night
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
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