Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
