There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
I walked in on him successfully eating chips and masturbating at the same time. I don't know whether I should be ashamed or proud.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
I woke up completely naked with the exception of my leg warmers. Last night must have been interesting.
You just managed to turn Dr. Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I think I found my saving grace in the form of a beard at the bar.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
